BOB SEGER SYSTEM - RAMBLIN' GAMBLIN' MAN (1969)

First off, let me just say that I actually love both this album and its cover. The Seger System's debut is a psychedelic rock 'n roll classic well worth a-checkin' out. But still….the disconnect between image and title is striking. I can almost hear Bob in a bar somewhere, "You know baby, I'm a ramblin' gamblin' man, like a nun touching herself on an ice-floe…"

Thankfully, Bob explains it all on the back cover: 

"The title of this album up until 3 days ago was 'Tales of Lucy Blue'. At that time I realized that Lucy Blue is Ramblin' Gamblin' Man. Thank you Doctor Fine!"

No, thank YOU, Doctor Seeger! You are now officially licensed to perform brain surgery.

PETE FOUNTAIN - CHEEK TO CHEEK (1993)

One of the things I love about album covers is that they're more than just an image: they're a unique combination of image, text, and indeed the subtext of the music itself. All three come together (ideally) in a beautiful, swirling symbiosis of meaning-making and expression that can move one beyond the plane of the mundane and literally transport you to another world of experience...

That said, sometimes that world can be a ruddy, sweaty, constipated kind of place. A place full of encrusted signet rings, cheap bourbon, & pepto-bismol. The kind of place your creepy uncle takes you to after the uncomfortable family reunion.  

No, sometimes I don't like album covers at all.

CROSBY, STILLS & NASH - LIVE IT UP (1990)

This testament to designing your album covers during all-day drinking sessions with your poker buddies was brought to you by: Coors Light, Oscar Mayer Wieners, and The Thing In David Crosby's Mustache that's been controlling his mind since at least 1967.


Shout out to Russ (he knows why)

PABLO CRUISE - PART OF THE GAME (1979)

I might not be an expert on animal rights, but I'm fairly certain forcing two undersized turtles to play competitive table-tennis in a glass ashtray in the middle of a Taiwanese casino (while you and your friends leer intoxicated-ly at them and place bets on the outcome) contravenes several important ones. Luckily for us, we can sleep sound in the knowledge that this horrible event never actually occurred, even if this horrible cover actually did: clearly this is just what results when you smoke the liner notes to Terrapin Station and then commission "that guy who does funny cartoons on the beach" to execute your vision.

EDDIE HARRIS - IS IT IN (1985)

I don't know what I find more offensive: the crudeness of the metaphor, the pinkish overtones used to emphasize it, or the utter lack of regard for punctuation here. Is it a question, a rhetorical question, or some kind of yoda-like backwards statement? Is it provacative, is it intelligent parody, is it pandering to the lowest common denominator?

 Is it in??? 

No, no it's not.

HERBIE MANN - PUSH PUSH (1971)

#1 on my list of things not to think about too hard is the relationship between this album's title and the sweaty, half-naked, flute-wielding Mann-bear on the cover. 

The fact that the words are punched out somehow adds to the overall creepiness. 

You're pushin' too hard, Herbie!

FREDDIE HUBBARD - WINDJAMMER (1976)

 

Nothing says windjammin' jazz music like wrapping Freddie Hubbard up in industrial-strength plastic cling wrap. His trumpet appears, quite fittingly, to be set on 'suck'.  Is that the sun behind him, or is it a giant yolk? Oh, I get it, he's windjammed inside the cosmic space-egg. This cover must be a yolk.